Seeing the Possibility

Convention, like real life, is a series of ups and downs.  Sometimes it feels like there is no way forward and that peace and change is impossible in this world.  Sometimes there is a glimmer of hope that perhaps the prophets who demanded a better world were crazy, but they were crazy enough to make a the impossible possible. 
Yesterday I posted about the dire necessity for change. This post came out of a low moment in a valley.  It came out of a moment of seeing the need for change but not seeing where this change would come from.  I still believe that change is needed, now more than ever, but today I have a more hopeful attitude that this change might actually happen in my lifetime.  There are many events in the past 24 hours that have brought me to this more hopeful position. Two events have particularly stood out to me.
The first was last night. I attended the Structure Committee hearing. This meeting was held at the same time as the Same Sex Blessing hearing, the PB & F hearing and a final committee hearing on the Israel/Palestine issue. For some reason, (read Holy Spirit) I chose to go to the boring structure committee.  In this meeting the committee introduced a substitute resolution which they had written.  This resolution (C001) gives me hope that change in the Episcopal Church is possible. This resolution, if passed would open the door to having the serious conversations that the Church needs to have about her future.  There are two items in this resolution that I am particularly excited about.  First, the task force that is being created is independent and the committee specifically asked that those appointed are not already involved in Church governance.  Hopefully, that means that the people appointed will have a fresh perspective.  Secondly, I glad that the necessity of including younger people in the decision making processes.  (In whose concept, except the Church, does young adult go all the way up to age 40!?)  This resolution offers a possibility of real change and it gives me hope.
The second was this afternoon.  I spoke with an alternate deputy that I had met a few days ago at a committee meeting.  We were pretty much on the same page about a lot of things.   This deputy is not considered young, but he is still well under the median age of Episcopalians (57).  I began to lament that I felt that although young adults were being represented at general convention in larger numbers but that our presence was mere tokenism.  Since there are so few deputies under 30 our presence does not have a “real” impact.  He corrected me and said that this was not true.  In fact he had seen that the testimony given by the young adults in the committee meetings, and the youth presence in the House of Deputies, had a large impact on the outcome of resolutions.  I left that conversation feeling lifted up, that although I was not a Deputy I was still an integral part of the Convention process. Then later this evening over ice cream one of my colleagues in the Young Adult Initiative told me that committee members shared that since she was the only one that testified on a resolution for prison ministry they are now recommending that it be adopted.  If no one had testified they would have dropped it and this important work within the Church might not have gone forward.  Although we do not have voting power, we do have power. 
It seems that in Convention life has a different speed.  The highs and lows of life that sometimes takes weeks, months or even years to change are changing in 24 hours at Convention.  Perhaps I shall be back in a valley tomorrow, but today I saw the possibility that can be seen from the top of the mountain.  I hope that I can remember these feelings and ideas the next time  I am low and seeing only the obstacles to the change that needs to happen in this Church. 

The Church needs new Shoes

July 7^th 2012

I had to buy new shoes while I was here in Indianapolis. I was told before convention started that we had to dress “Business Casual” and that flip flops were definitely outside of that dress code. I looked in my closet and pulled out the shoes that I never wear and put them in my suitcase. I thought that these shoes would be what I needed during convention to participate.

The first day I noticed that I was getting a blister on my small toe as I walked around from hotel to hotel and within the convention center. Luckily, I had brought another pair of shoes. I tried those on. These gave me a blister on my heel. After lunch on the second day I went and bought two new pairs of shoes. Both of them “flip flops.” My feet are much more comfortable now and I am able to walk about the halls and continue the important work that I am here to do.

I tell this story because I think that it is an allegory for what the Church is doing now. We have been wearing shoes that are tearing our feet apart. These shoes are preventing us from being the Body of Christ. They look pretty on the outside but are literally tearing us apart on the inside. Whenever we put right theology over and above love we are denying the Gospel. We are so concerned with being right in our theology that we do not see how that relates to our lives. These shoes of our theology are hurting our body. We are so concerned with keeping up appearances we forget that we do not exist for these 'shoes'. They exist for us.

This morning in during Eucharist the gospel stated, “Do whatever they (Pharisees and Scribes) teach you and follow it; but do not do what they do, for they do not practice what they teach. They tie up heavy burdens, hard to bear, and lay them on the shoulders of others; but they themselves are unwilling to lift a finger to move them.” (Matthew 23:1-12)  Our Church is very good at imitating the Pharisees. This morning Bishop Curry preached on the necessity of being crazy. We would rather have an appearance of justice than real justice. Last night one of my fellow Episcopal Peace Fellowship talked about the feeling like this was all useless because of our lack of ability to act on the resolutions we pass. I feel the same sometimes, but we have to be crazy to believe, in the face of the history and in the face of the multitudes of injustice in this world that God is, in fact, acting to create God's community here on Earth. 

The change that this Church needs is radical. But we are already suffering the pains from not making these changes. We are at a crossroads in the Church. (Perhaps the Church must constantly choose the path but that is for a different post). We have the option of choosing to hobble along with these shoes that are literally killing us, or we can discard these shoes and get new shoes that will carry us into the future that we need. We can delay this choice. However, God is present here and the building of God's Community requires something different than a broken hobble down the wrong path. Whenever we finally get to the point where we can no longer walk we will begin to look for those shoes that will support us in rebuilding our broken feet. It is our choice when we get new shoes.

-Maryann Philbrook

Loving all well: the People vs. the Church

I have been thinking about the rationale we use within the Church to justify our actions. Occasionally the right action is clear in a given situation. Often path to right action is not set out before us. I saw this demonstrated in the testimony I heard about two different controversial resolutions today.

The first resolution I listened to testimony on this morning was C029 which would have changed the canon to no longer require baptism for those who receive communion. It was clear in the testimony that we all want the Church to be open and inclusive. Every person, on either side of the debate, was looking for a way to grow our Church. We want to reach out to those that are unchurched. We want to reach out to people who desperately need to hear about God's love.

The second resolution was actually a series of resolutions (B010, C064 etc) on how the Church will go forward in relation to the continuing occupation of Palestine by Israel. One of the people testifying opened his testimony by saying that his opinion on the issue was as complicated as the issue itself. The issue is complicated, but mainly because we are failing to boldly proclaim Jesus' love for all people.

Today's struggle for me has been to remain present in this convention as I have become more convinced than ever that Church is not something that happens within four walls (and especially not something that happens within four non-unionized hotels). Church is that what happens when we go outside these walls. God is found everywhere, but God chose to become human and then die as a political prisoner. Jesus' harshest words were for the members of the religious ruling class that took their religion and tradition more seriously than compassion and love.

One of my favorite stories in the Gospel is the story of Jesus' healing of the bleeding woman (Mark 5:21-43). The framing of the story of this woman is just as important as her story. The story opens with the leader of the synagogue telling Jesus that his daughter is dying. While on the way to his house this woman, who would have been banished from religious society, touches Jesus' robe because she believes “If I can just touch his clothes, I shall be saved.” (v28 New Jerusalem Translation). The woman is, in fact, cured of her sickness. Since Jesus waited to cure this woman the daughter of synagogue leader dies. (SPOILER ALERT– Jesus then goes and wakes her because she was only sleeping). This story speaks to me tonight. We are called to emulate Jesus. He was not about the hierarchy of the Church. He did not believe that we had to follow the rules in order to be included. If anything he believed the opposite. Love and compassion heal. I love this story because it demonstrates how Jesus goes out of his way to heal and show love for those that are normally excluded by the Church.
Today both of these resolutions are attempting to address how we as a Church react to and include those that are different from us. Do we allow those that are unbaptized to share in Jesus' body? I believe that we should. We are only giving what God has given us. We do not have the right to keep that from anyone. In Palestine, in the land where Jesus walked, we see people living in occupied territories. We see the suffering. We need to be able to offer them compassion because they are in a powerless situation. As a Church we need to expand beyond our walls and our comfort zones. We need to take God's love to the streets to the people that have been excluded.
General Convention should be a place where we recommit the Church to it's mission. I am being conflicted because I am beginning to be jaded. I am beginning to think that this convention is about Church politics and having the right colored shirt rather than about teaching each other how to love God's people better. This conflict in my heart is not new, it is a one that I have been believing with and struggling with for some time. How do we stay relevant in this Church while remaining true to our tradition and learning to love the world around us?

God's Heart Beat

July 5^th 2012

Yesterday in Presiding Bishop Katharine Jeffert's Schori's opening statement she described General Convention as “this Church’s regular opportunity to strengthen that incarnate heart for its work in the coming years. We’re here for a tune-up – to breathe deep, clear our vision, focus the muscles, and synchronize our heartbeat with God’s.”

The heartbeat of God is beating for justice. I am here because I see justice as the central call of the Gospel. The idea that justice as part of God's heartbeat is a new-fangled, non-bibilical view is plainly and simply wrong. God has been calling people into just relationship with each other and creation since the creation of the people. Over and over again we get distracted by other objectives by the importance of our own lives. The presiding spoke to this today in her opening sermon during worship: “We have opportunities here in abundance to forswear those evils, to lay down our various weapons of division, and to work together for the commonwealth of God’s created world. Is our faith lively enough to do works toward that kind of abundant life? In everything we do here, remember those whom we serve, that we may do unto them as we would have done to us – for this is the law and the prophets, and indeed, this is the good news of the reign of God.”

Is our faith strong enough and flexible enough for us to determine what course of action needs to be taken both during this sacred time during Convention and in the following triennium? I testified today on two resolutions that are at the very heart of our Church's commitment to do justice. The first resolution I spoke to will commit the Church to nine more years of anti-racism training around the country. (A125) The second resolution I spoke to will allow the Church to advocate for just economic and development policies (A012). There appeared to be general support for passage for both of these resolutions within the committee. However, this was only the first step to becoming a funded resolution.

In 2006 the Episcopal Church resolved that all future General Conventions would be held in hotels that were Unionized, or barring that, paid a living wage to their employees. This year we are in Indianapolis where no hotels are unionized and the hotels that we are staying at do not pay their employees a living wage. In fact, many of them are undergoing a class action law suit claiming that they pay their employees less than minimum wage.

When we are gathered here at General Convention we pass pretty resolutions and talk about the need for justice for all. Yet we do not act on these principles when we are given the clear choice. We chose to come to a city with no union hotels. We could have chosen a different location. The resolution that was passed at the 75^th General Convention has become meaningless. What will happen to the resolutions that get through the 77^th General Convention. We are failing to take collective responsibility for our Church. We are instead passing resolutions with no way to enforce them if there is no will within the Church politics.

Part of this failure is because we are failing, in some ways, to understand the true nature of the Gospel and of God. In her sermon this morning the Presiding Bishop spoke about a new Saint, Walter Rauschenbusch. He believed that: “a historical tendency to substitute personal salvation for the kingdom of God meant that people “seek to save their own souls and are selfishly indifferent to the evangelization of the world.” The good news to the world, in his eyes, was about the reign of God on this earth.

The Episcopal Church has the opportunity and the will to bring about God's reign, but the only question is will we, as a collective whole, overcome our fears of failure and irrelevance in order to align our hearts with the heart beat of God.

-Maryann Philbrook

A day of contrasts

July 4^th 2012

I've been spending a lot of my time recently with Occupy Austin. I've become enmeshed in that culture of direct democracy. General Convention is the largest representative democracy in the world. My recent experience with Occupy has changed the way I think about democracy and representation.

The first resolution I heard this morning was A073, which is intended to create a mulitmedia resource for evangelism, specifically focusing on issues of multicultural and multilingual inclusion. This resolution was given $30,000 over a three year period. The resolution itself seems rather innocuous. Evangelism is a good thing. We should be approaching it in culturally sensitive way. Good idea. No brainer, right? The issue is for what purpose and to whom will this $30,000 go? The committee that created this resolution (all resolutions that start with A were created by committees) did not have a clear answer. My first response was that clearly the committee that created this resolution would be carrying out the proposal. The idea that you can propose something that you, yourself, are not carrying out has been driven out of my realm of possibility during my time Occupying. You are utterly responsible for what you propose. This works in a small community. I am starting to believe that this would work in a larger community but it would require more humility and the ability to work together. If all proposals had to be carried out by the person proposing them we would have many fewer proposals.

I saw two more proposals that had budgetary items of $1,000,000 and $100,000 that were also planning on some other body carrying them out. The Episcopal Church has money. (Not as much as it used to, but still....). We are using this money instead of using people to make things happen. Don't get me wrong, money helps, but money is not the solution to what ails the Church. We need more people to see that we are relevant to their lives. We need to have the relationships that form over time that influence people, one day at a time, towards choosing the path of Life. These items are intangible and do not have a price tag. I've learned through Occupying that people who have no money can make a lot happen.

The Presiding Bishop released a budget that shifted the way the Episcopal Church organizes its money. This budget prioritizes actions over money. This framework was adopted by the Program, Budget and Finance Committee today. I think this is an important shift. In the opening remarks by Presiding Bishop Schori, she reminded us that our Church is in the midst of a transition. We are in the midst of a new breath of the Holy Spirit coming through. This breath might feel like a dying gasp to some of us and to others it might feel like the first breath after almost drowning.

Overall today was complicated day. I spent a lot of time thinking about the actions taking place back in Austin, TX where Occupiers were holding a day of teach ins and music and speeches at the State Capitol. I was distracted by these thoughts.  I also spent a lot of time thinking about how we are always waiting for someone else to do the work. Yet we can wait no longer. We must start to do the work we want to see done.  I am glad that we have the leadership in the Church right now that recognizes how important it is that our mission influence our financial decisions rather that vice verse.

Prisons in this country need some serious change.

July 3^rd 2012.

I wrote this while I was on a plane from Dallas to Indianapolis to participate in the 77^th General Convention of the Episcopal Church.

On the front page of the New York Times today there is an article entitled, “Poor Land in Jail as Companies add Huge Fees for Probation.” The article goes on to outline the stores of states, like Alabama, which give their probation control over to for profit companies. This article gives on woman's story. She received a speeding ticket for $179. Now, three years later she is in debt for over $3,000 and has spent more than 40 days in jail. These companies make money on the backs of the poor. This country has handed over it's criminal justice system, like probation and prisons, over to private companies. These corporations seek only to increase their bottom line.

We incarcerate more people than any other country on Earth. Jesus began his ministry by quoting the prophet Isaiah. “The spirit of the Lord is on me, for he has anointed me to bring good new to the afflicted. He has sent me to proclaim liberty to captives, sight to the blind, to let the oppressed go free, to proclaim a year of favour from the Lord.” (Luke 4:18-19 The New Jerusalem Bible) The current system in this country is a punitive, profit driven system. Jesus tells us that he is beginning a different system. Yet, 2,000 years later we aer still just starting to see glimpses of that community that God is building through Jesus, the Holy Spirit and the Church.

We need to stand up and fight the injustices before us. We need to look around us at all the “criminals” and see that they too, just like you and me, are created in the image of God. When we start to do that it is only natural to clamor loudly for justice for all. God's most precious gift, our brothers and sisters, are being mistreated in the name of a false god: Profit. We are called to carry out Jesus' mission. We too will set the captives free.

#GC77

I'm attending the General Convention of the Episcopal Church as a member of the Young Adult Initiative. 

I'll be posting a series of blogs about my trip. 

Here is the introduction that I posted about myself a few days ago. 

My name is Maryann Philbrook. I currently live in Austin, TX where I attend the Episcopal Mission of St. Julian's of Norwich. I am very busy here in Austin. I work full time as a Customer Service representative. Answering phone calls, technical support, that sort of thing. It pays the bills. I also work part time (very part time) as the Children's Minister at my Church. I was running the Children's Chapel program during the past school year. I also work part time (also very part time) as an attendant for a friend of mine who has a disability. When I'm not doing one of these three paid jobs, I organize with Occupy Austin, which is where I see my faith most vibrantly come alive. One of my passions is travel. I have lived and travelled in over 15 countries on 4 different continents.

I have been an Episcopalian all my life and I'm drawn to the practical side of my faith. I believe that when Jesus said he came to preach Good News to the poor, he meant it. Literally. In trying to explore this understanding of my faith and my calling, I have worked with Ecumenical groups, like the World Council of Churches and the World Student Christian Federation. I have also worked with Episcopal groups like the Episcopal Service Corps. This year, I am excited to be joining the Episcopal Peace Fellowship as part of their Young Adult Initiative at General Convention. I understand that the issues facing our country, and the world, are bigger than our individual lives. Each individual is affected by the systemic and structural organization of our government and our global society. I am coming to General Convention because I want to be a part of the work the EPF is doing in moving the Church towards its prophetic role.

I have found numerous resolutions that I am looking forward to learning more about and, hopefully, influencing the outcome of during General Convention. The one I am most passionate about is Resolution A040, “Establish the Church as the Moral Voice on Health Care.”

When I finished my year as Intern with the Episcopal Service Corps I was ineligible to be insured through my parents insurance so I bought a Major Medical Insurance policy. While living with my parents, I was stung by a bug in the middle of the night. We went to local ER where they gave me a shot of cortizone and sent me home. This treatment cost over $1,000. My deductible was $5,000, so the insurance I was buying did not cover a dime. My parents are still paying off this trip to the ER. We need healthcare reform that offers everyone equal access to health care, not just a mandate to have insurance.

In 1991 General Convention recognized that we need change: Resolved, the House of Deputies concurring, That the 70th General Convention decries the inequitable health care delivery system of the United States of America and calls upon the President, the Congress, Governors and other leaders to devise a system of universal access for the people of our country. (A009)

Currently there is a resolution on the table to (A040) to establish the Episcopal Church as the moral voice on health care. This resolution would resolve:

Every member of The Episcopal Church make a moral commitment to health care for all of citizens and legal residents by actively supporting the full implementation and funding of the health care reform law in the United States.

This is not a “Moral” stance. This law still leaves 26 million people uninsured. This law does not ensure all Americans have equal access to health care. Requiring that the government fund a law it has already passed is asking the government to do what it has promised to do. A moral stance does more than ask the bare minimum of our government.

The recent ruling by the Supreme Court seriously undermines the enforceability of the ACA. Without the ability ensure that states expand medicaid coverage many people will not be able to afford the new, mandated, insurance. The personal mandate was ruled to be constitutional, but without the expansion of medicaid millions of people who cannot afford insurance will still be without insurance and will owe the government money because of this 'penalty'. Endorsing this piece of legislation, as a moral stance, is immoral because this legislation, although it improves the health care situation in our country, is a far cry from the reforms that are needed to actually enure that everyone in the US receives the health care they need when they need it.

In 2009 the General Convention resolved that: The Episcopal Church urge passage of federal legislation establishing a “single payer” universal health care program which would provide health care coverage for all of the people of the United States (2009 D 048). Stating that this Affordable Care Act is a moral bill is going back on our commitment to supporting a truly universal health care system.

The Episcopal Church does need to become the moral voice on health care. However, this will take prophetic witness to what is possible, not a simple endorsement of a compromised bill that does little address the real causes of problems in our health care system.

There are many more resolutions that we will be considering during Convention. I hope to be able to address resolution A012, “Advocate for a Just Global Economy for International Trade.” Having travelled abroad and seen the disparity among nations I know, first hand, that we need to make ensure that our economic policies are just. I also hope to speak to resolution A017, “Monitor the use and Ethics of Drone Warfare.” As we become a society with instant communication we also become a society with the ability to cause instant destruction. The Church needs to make a statement on the morality of the use of the drone warfare in which the US is currently engaged.

I am hoping and praying that General Convention will be a time of growth and learning and fruitful work for all who attend. I am looking forward to being a part of that with the Episcopal Peace Fellowship.